Whhhaaaatttttt is going on?

Hello fine people who read this blog (Mom),

I am sorry for the delay in writing a regular blog. I have shirked my duties and am trying to make up for it now. Wow, where did we leave off? I guess we can go off of Madeline's MaleMale blog which was early November. A few very significant things have happened in between then and now. For one, I went home for the first time since leaving Texas!

My sister (Beth) got married to a heck of a catch, Mark Peluse.  The wedding was amazing! I'm not going to lie, a few tears were shed during the ceremony but that led to unbridled joy as I saw how happy and elated my sister was. The reception was at a Spanish Tapas restaurant Meson Sebika. All I can say is, Oh My Aguh! The food was excellent and fun cause it was family "tapas" style so everyone had to interact at your table together. The reception space was set up gorgeously and everything looked perfect. I had a great time catching up with everyone and I am sorry if I couldn't talk forever with you as I wanted to make sure I talked to as many people as I could since I didn't know the next time I would have the chance.

Work has been going well. We are almost done with our "High Season" as those of you back at Binny's knows, there is no rest until January haha. I have been working avg 55 hour weeks which can pay a toll on the body but the paycheck is worth it haha. Working customer service is never the best job around the holidays as I am finding out again that I ruin Christmas on a daily basis this week haha.

I have painted the middle of my apartment these last two weeks. It creates some nice color between my white walls of my living room and bedroom. The dining room is a nice almost olive green which really makes the apt. look great. Madeline also helped in that endeavor. She also gave me a great gift for my living room walls. She took two photos (one of the Austin Skyline and the other of Chicago) and had engineering prints (large scale 24x36") made of the photos and had them framed. So I now have great views of the two cities I love.

This past weekend was busy and relaxing at the same time. On Saturday, I didn't have to go into work which was nice. Madeline met with her friend and decorated a tree on The Capital of Texas Highway (360 for those in the know). This has become an Austin tradition even though it's not technically legal. For a stretch of the highway, people choose a tree (cedar most likely) and decorate it like a Christmas tree. Madeline's friend Becky scouted out a tree which is no easy feat as they go quickly regardless of legality haha. They donned the usual trimmings: ornaments, tinsel, and other stuff. It really is pretty cool to drive that stretch and see all the different tree decorating ideas people come up with. While they were off doing that I was cleaning my apt. in preparation of a momentous Sunday to come. LOTR (Lord of the Rings) DAY!

As many of you know, and for those who don't, my friends and I celebrate LOTR Day every year by watching all 3 extended versions in a row. 12 hours of Middle Earth mayhem!! We started this tradition in 2007 and during the opening speech (traditionally given by my friend Braden whom we had speakerphoned in this year) made note of this fact saying that the year we started, the first iPhone was being released!! How crazy is that! Anyway, we had one addition in Austin other than Madeline and myself. My friend Patrick Owens (PO for short) joined us for a movie before he had to go volunteer at the Trail of Lights (more on this in a second). Fun was had by all and delicious food was enjoyed by us haha. One such dish was Madeline's hash brown casserole. Soo delicious. It has all you need, eggs, bacon, hash browns, cheese yummm!!

Speaking of Trail of Lights (nice segue huh), this week is the opening week of Austin's famous Trail of Lights. To open the lights, they held a 5k race which Mad's and I took part in. There were about 8,000 people and it ran around Zilker Park in the dark (we were provided with glow stick necklaces for the really dark areas) and then through the actual Trail of Lights in all it's glory and splendor! Man it looked amazing. It's like any of the houses back home that have crazy amounts of decorations but it is confined to about a half mile stretch of road in the park. Super fun to run by.

As Christmas approaches (I even put up a Christmas tree in my apt!!) I want to wish everyone a happy and safe holiday and I hope you all get the pony you asked for. I am sorry there are a lack of pictures but I do not have internet at home so I am at a Starbucks writing this blog post. I will try to post pics once I can get them all in one easy to access location. Or if Mad's reads this, she can add some to the post haha. Anyway, I miss everyone a lot and love to chat or text so if you want to talk feel free to call/text. You can also write and I will write back. Have a great holiday everyone!

This post's recipe is Madeline's Hash Brown Casserole. Enjoy everyone! I think it will be great for Christmas if you have more than 2 mouths to feed haha. I linked it above because I can't seem to copy and paste the recipe into the blog. Anywheezy, Have a great week everyone and may Santa bring you all you asked for!!

Skuds of Suds

I'm writing this story as a word of warning and because it's a crazy story. So in my last post, I wrote that my dad drove all the way from IL with a gigantic trailer and his car packed with my stuff for the apt move in (he is awesome by the way, helping me move in and basically putting my apartment together while I started my new job, I can't thank him enough) . He should also get a Purple Heart after what happened (which I will tell you now haha).

My dad had packed up some of my homebrew and fancy bottles from my collection so I would have some beer to drink at my apt. We learned a valuable lesson on transporting beer, especially homebrew long distances in a car. While he was driving, the boxes of beer were behind him and all of a sudden, POW!!!! Bottles just started exploding!!! The shaking from the car plus the heat plus what happens when you shake carbonated beverages equals brown glass shrapnel while driving 65mph on a busy highway!! I guess my dad could have been a fighter pilot in a past life because he said he never slowed the car or swerved haha.

When he finally pulled up to the apt. complex, we quickly took out the boxes and put them under the U-Haul trailer so that they had a ceiling to smash into instead of in the air and in our faces. The whole rest of the move in you would hear random explosions and glass shattering. It was crazy!!

Once the trailer was unloaded we had to return it but that meant we had to move the mini mortars! We slowly pulled the boxes out and it was like a bomb squad trying to defuse a bomb. Sometimes we chose the wrong wire and a bottle neck would explode shooting 20 ft. in the air over our heads!!! Insane. We finally got the bottles in the dumpster and let me tell you it really sounds like gunfire inside a metal box haha.

Let this be a warning to those looking to transport beer for long distances, maybe put them in a jello like substance or keep them on a cooler even though you aren't gonna drink them right away. Either way, pray you have the nerves of Larry Burnside if one should go off in transit. I know I'd be in the side of a wall if that happened and I was driving haha.

I am now accepting beer packages to make up for the list soldiers.

Strap in and Feel the B's (urnside)

Family, Friends, Texans, Illinoisans lend me your ear! I AM ALIVE!!!!!! Yes I am writing to you, this is not a hoax! Where do I begin? Let me say now, this will be a long post. i am going to be writing about my whole experience up to now. So if you have been following Madeline's blog, this will be a refresher from a different perspective. If you haven't, this is my whole trip and experience living in Austin from June 'til now.

After the send off to send all off (with a surprise from Madeline at my party) Madeline and I hit the road for the Lone Star State. It torrential rained the minute we hit Bloomington-Normal all the way to our first stop. Thankfully it stopped for 30 minutes (I'm not lying), because  the Gateway Arch in St. Louis was our first stop. Can you believe Madeline has never been there? I KNOW!! We walked to the entrance in a slight mist and when we got tickets to go up, by the time the super claustraphobic egg ride finished, the clouds had parted and we could see all the way...into the cornfields of Illinois haha.

From there we made our way to the day's end destination. My dad's Aunt Emy and Uncle Gene's house in Rogers, AR. It is so nice to stay with family on long trips. Having a comfy bed and nice shower to rest up for another day of 10 + hours of driving really makes a difference. We left the next day and continued our road trip. I have to say the drive to TX from IL is not the most picturesque and sometimes its really hard to stay alert driving through 10 hours of cornfields. Thank God for NW AR with its beautiful hills and winding roads, because after that, it was more cornfields in OK, and northern TX.

We finally reached Marble Falls, TX and Madeline's camp after 12 hours of driving. It was so nice to know that we would not be driving for a long time after that. I've often been told that I couldn't have picked a worse time to move down to TX haha. I had to come down during the hottest most oppressive time in Texas' year weather wise and that is no lie! They averaged triple digit Temps for over 2 weeks straight!! This portly fellow from Chicago looked like he went swimming in his clothes about 10 minutes just walking out the door!

For the next 6 weeks my days consisted of going to the local coffee shops and looking for jobs, applying for jobs, interviewing for jobs. That's pretty much it. Kind of boring but a much needed necessity because I couldn't live on Madeline's camp forever. Nor would I want to, they are about 60+ miles from Austin so commuting meant 120 miles round trip! My car could not do that with any consistency which I found out at about week 4 haha. I had gotten a job (my first job in the state of TEXAS!!) as a bread delivery driver for a small bakery called Great Harvest Bakery. I would wake up at 4:30am leave Madeline's by 5 to get to work a little after 6. Picked up the bread to be delivered to two local Costcos and the other bakery location (they don't actually bake at the second location). Then I would come back and pick up super fresh baked bread (the bakers get to the bakery at 3am to start baking the bread for the day) and take more over to the second location. It was an ok job, money coming in at least, hours kind of blew, but I met some really nice people. One of the bakers loves to cook and I turned him on to Giardinara and Beer Brats so on my last day he brought me in a jar of homemade Giardinara (which doesn't exist in stores down here) and cooked me beer brats in the huge bread oven so when I came back from deliveries they were ready to eat on loaves he made that morning. MY GOD WAS IT SUPER DELICIOUS!!!! It tasted a like a little bit of home so far away.

Ok, back to week 4 or maybe 5. I was heading to work at 5 like I always did and this was my lasst week at the bakery because I had found a full-time job (more on that in a bit) and I got to the Perdenales River Bridge and a few warning lights turned on my dashboard. I started to freak out once I pressed on the gas, and nothing happened. I lost power steering and was going 70+ mph down the road. Luckily a gas station appeared and I swerved off the road and almost, ALMOST in to their uphill driveway.  Luckily the brakes worked so I didn't slide back into traffic and i called Madeline to help me out. When she arrived we tried pushing the car into the gas station but I learned as strong as I thought I was, I couldn't push a car up a hill by myself. A truck full of guys pulled up, got out, pushed my car up the hill into the station, got back in their truck and drove away. I was so grateful to my hill country guardian angels haha. I didn't even get to say thank you, it was done before I knew it. So I called for a tow and waited for it to arrive. I didn't know that Monday was everyone needed a tow truck day because I waited from 6am-4pm at the gas station before a truck came.

Now where I was stranded I had a predicament. I was literally in the middle of Marble Falls and Austin. Literally. 30 miles in either way. Can you imagine the price of the tow!!!!!? I was able, through the help of Yelp, find a local garage that was only 5 miles away on the road I was stranded on! What luck! I got the car towed and the little Hispanic man, Luis told me he would call me once he got the damage report and he hoped it was just a hose that broke and leaked all my coolant out of the car. This turned out to not be the case. I guess, I didn't have coolant in my car for a little bit and my engine overheated and blew the head gasket and other parts of my engine. Yay! And instead of a $100 hose replace, it was $1900 engine rebuild!!!! SUPER AWESOME! They said my car would be ready in a week because they had to machine a whole new part. So a week goes by, I'm using Madeline's car as my mode of transportation by the way (which is not the most in shape car in the world but her car is like an old battle axe. A lot of scars but keeps rolling). I call Luis, and it will be another day, next day comes, one more day, that day comes, one more day. At this point I should mention, I have found an apartment, a nice 1 bedroom right on I-35 and Oltorf pretty close to my new job and friends who live in Austin. Also, my dad is in town helping me move all my stuff he brought down from IL into my apartment. So Thursday (a week and 4 days later) my car is ready and we go pick it up. It was so nice to have a functioning car, a place to sleep, and a full time job to go to, and all my things about me. This all happened in less than a week.

I had mentioned I had gotten a new full-time job. I now work for a company called Amplifier. They are a third party customer service/ logistics company that warehouses, produces and ships products for various online companies so they do not have to worry about that sort of stuff. Some of our top clients are Livestrong, The Chive, Rooster Teeth, Homestar Runner and Rowdy Gentlemen. I basically answer and respond to people's online complaints or questions. Like when you fill out a basic email form on a website and send it in to that company "Where's my stuff!" I'm the one who tells you it's on it's way. The people I work with are great and it's always fun to go to work (weird I know). The company is also sponsored by CrossFit, kind of like P90X or Insanity. It's a crazy workout that uses the body as it's main form of resistance. Anyway, they offer 3 free classes AT Amplifier a week taught by one of my co-workers who is licensed in the techniques. It's a tough class. I mean, I threw up the first workout. But I take solice in knowing that everyone has thrown up at least once during these workouts haha. That leads us to today. I'm sitting in a small local coffee shop (Thunderbird Coffee) with Madeline and writing this up.

I hope everyone is doing well back home. I miss you all terribly and I cannot wait to come back and see everyone in November.  My new address is:

3209 S IH-35
Apt. 1-3094
Austin, TX 78741

I accept all letters and packages. If sent a letter I will write back. I love you all.


Kyle

Easy Tiger

Yesterday, I went to a new bar/bakery called Easy Tiger.  I must say that I really like this place. A lot.  It's on E. 6th Street in the historic district just west of I-35. It is two levels, the upstairs is the bakery where you can buy bread and desserts to go and see them bake everything.  Downstairs is the bar area with a sweet outdoor patio.  The music was nice, nothing popular, pretty eclectic and they also had a lot of old-timey French music to kind of go with the theme they were jiving. 

Their menu was based off the bakery obviously, but all their meats and breads were made on site.  I had the Smoked Turkey sandwich with Avocado, Radishes, and Smoked Jalapeno Aioli.  I got the half order and thank God that I did, this thing was huge!! Alas, I was hungry and didn't get a pic of it haha, you are going to have to trust me on this.  Another thing they do is called Easy Boards.  It's basically a tray with various items that go together, such as pretzel, Bratwurst, Sauerkraut, Beer Cheese, Potato Salad, and House Mustard.  It's a meal on a plate almost like a tapas DIY. Great for a couple or small group of people.

I heard of this place through some ATX twitter feeds I follow and found out they were celebrating Belgian Independence Day. Because of this special occasion they were giving away tulip commemorative glasses when you ordered some of the special Belgian Beers they had on tap. Of course I was hooked after reading that. I ordered the Ommegang Independence Day ale that is only release on tap for yesterday. It was a Tripel and it was delicious.  The glass was pretty cool, it had the red lion with BID spelled out around it and Belgian (And Belgian Style) brewery names around the entire glass.

For dessert I had an Old Rasputin that they had on Nitro.  I expected it to come in a small 10 oz snifter like everywhere else that sells it puts it in.  Imagine my surprise and happiness when they bring it to me in a 16oz mug!! It was the perfect finish to a great meal.  Roasty, Chocolate, and Coffee Yum.

The back patio was almost Grotto-like with it inside a huge rock formation with white lights and speakers on the wall of the rock.  It looked sweet.  On the side of the building they had 3 ping-pong tables along the little river next to them.  I would be so afraid I would knock all the balls into the water! Overall I would give this place 4.5/5 I think it would get a higher rating if I went with people and it wasn't between shifts for waitresses. Cheers!

Male Mail: Male Mail: Week 4

Madeline writes a blog letting everyone back home know what's going on in our lives down here in the Lone Star State.  Everyone should check it out. There is a recipe at the end of the post every week of the best meal we made during it. She does a great job and the name is the first two letters of her name and the last two of mine hence "Male".
Male Mail: Male Mail: Week 4: MALE MAIL: WEEK 4   I hope everyone's electricity is back up and running to those of you back in the Chicago area or out eastward.  I c...

Adult Soap Box Derby (not that adult)

So this weekend was the ever popular, Marble Falls Adult Soap Box Derby.  Instead of Boy Scouts or children's groups, professionals (Mechanics, Oil Change shops, Grown-ups with some mechanical aptitude) build some out landish racers and they race down a gigantic hill down the middle of town.  There are tons of people watching and screaming (and drinking, not sure on the law of public consumption but if you had a can coozie, it was filled with beer.  Didn't matter if you passed the police who were also racing this weekend).  Needless to say it was a fun weekend watching people hurl themselves down a road at 30+ mph for a trophy.  I posted some pics on Facebook, but I'll try to put some up here so you don't have to go there (go if you want, that's always cool and my +Klout score will thank you haha).

On Sunday, after the time trials were over and before the finals, they had a race called Jamaican.  What this consists of is the team pushing their derby car down the hill and one person jumping on the back to gain more speed and weight.  There is a point where the team has to stop pushing and then the two man car has a series of slaloms to complete before the drag race down the rest of the hill.  It's insane, and I was surprised no one flipped, until the last Jamaican race. It was double elimination and one derby car had not lost and during the championship run, they were neck and neck so the person on the back stood up and started leaning forward and thrusting himself forward to try and get more momentum.  They woman driver didn't know this was going to happen and one of the thrusts put her of course and she over compensated and like many action movies, the car skidded sideways and rolled on top of the woman, throwing the back teammate over it all.  Luckily they both had helmets, but that's it.  Just T-Shirts and shorts.  It was scary as both members lay motionless at the bottom of the hill.  They didn't move for over 3 minutes while people were sprinting down the hill to come to their aid. There was only one man (The finish line flagger) trying to help both racers.  The crowd went silent, Mads and I were sitting next to the family of the team that flipped.  Needless to say they were all rushing off the stands to get to the aid of their loved ones.  A paramedic came around the corner to take care of them.  Finally after about 20 minutes, the announcer (who also ran down to the crash) and a member of the team, came back up and said none of the injuries were life threatening (Thank God).  Just shock and major road rash, the driver had a severe cut above her eye (And I would bet a consussion, you don't lie there motionless for that long without being unconscious).  Needless to say, other than that crash, it was a great weekend.  I'm not sure if Jamaican is a very smart way of celebrating Soap Box Derby unless some more safety measures are put in place.

 Even the Marble Falls Police had a car in the race, with working lights. Or else they have some budget issues.

 Some cars had front facing seats, this one's name was "Love Sausage". These people are way too crazy for me.

 The derby cars came in all shapes and sizes, the "NO RULE 10" car's body kept wiggling as it went down, we all thought it was going to break apart like a Victory Auto-Wreckers car at the bottom. It stayed in tact all weekend.

 The license plate says OUTATIME and Doc is in the passenger seat

 The woman in the purple tri-racer was the one who flipped later in the day. As you can see, there isn't much keeping her in the racer. It has a couple 45 lb weights in the back plus the weight of another man who jumped on back during Jamaican making it pretty heavy and not fun when it lands on you at 30+ mph. Thankfully she is ok.

This is the back of the "NO RULE 10" car, nice comfortable seat. I like the slogan on the back. Maybe some day, I can get a crew together for this competition.  It looks a lot of fun, we may not participate in the Jamaican section but straight-up racing would be fun.  Team FIBS, who's with me?

The Stars at Night, are Big and Bright, Cause I Moved Down to Texas

As many of you probably already know (and for those who don't keep reading) I recently moved down to Austin, Texas.  My girlfriend Madeline works down here and I thought it was high time I did something about it.  So I packed up my stuff and moved down here. I've been here two days and already I've experienced rain (which they say is not that often), 60+mph winds, tons of lightning, and now, tropical heat. I've spent these two days revamping the resume and applying to about 10-15 jobs already online. Tomorrow I start the physical store to store applicationing.  I am hoping that my hand will last long enough or else I will find some newfound ambidexterity so I can fill everything out.  I'm nervous, excited and excited even more.  I was in the market for a change of pace and boy is this a good start.  I can't wait to see what life has in store for me in the Lone Star State. If anyone has any suggestions as to where I can find a job in Austin, let me know.  I'm all ears!! or eyes, since you will most likely be typing your response. More to come!!

I can haz brewed beer?

Last Thursday, my dad and I went to Bev-Art in Beverly (has a nice ring to it) to partake in a beer brewing class. I had gotten a gift certificate for Christmas so I set up the appointment and off we went. When we got there and walked into the store, it smelled amazing. I don't know if many of you have been on a brewery tour, but when you walk into the room with the Mash Tuns (where they make the grain soup (Wort) which is beer before anything else is added) and it smells sweet and bready, well that's what this store smelled like. It was awesome. We checked in and the old man (hippie) told us that our classroom was actually across the street in an old insurance company storefront. "Just look for the door with all the white paper covering it," oookkk. Once across the street we walk into this room with some long tables and round tables and two big turkey fryers in the front. The two teachers were trying to find ways to move power cords to other outlets so that they wouldn't blow fuses, it didn't work.

The head teacher couldn't get his power point up and running because he kept losing power to the front half of the room. Also, those turkey fryers suck so much electricity that the fuse kept getting blown haha. So they kept trying different combinations of turning on and off different lights or only turning one fryer (which as I forgot to mention was being used as a water boiler with malt in them to make a "starter wort" for all of the participants of the class) and letting one stay off for a little bit and then turning one off and starting the other. Did I mention he was doing this all while explaining to the class the process and history of brewing beer? This guy was muli-talented and not easily discouraged that is for sure. During his lecture, he had his assistant pour out samples of different styles of beers to showcase different points in his lecture. I think this helped him keep calm, more alcohol the better.

Now, those who know me, know I love beer. I love talking about it, drinking it, and learning about it so this first part of the class was heaven for me especially because it was hands on and we got to try different beers. We probably started in the wrong order but that's ok, we had a Firestone Walker's "Walker's Reserve Porter" which is roasty, dark and delicious. Second was the Lagunitas "Doppelweizen" which has a lot of bananas and sweetness (not my favorite but I'm a hophead). Next was Firestone Walkers "Double Jack Double IPA", I love this beer and have had it before but I love it's grapfruity, mango smells and citrusy flavors. After that we started brewing but the beer didn't stop flowing haha. We had a Black IPA (Cascadian Dark Ale), Avery's "The Reverend" Belgian Quad and a Sweet Stout. The Black IPA and Sweet Stout were brewed by our teacher and OH. MY. AGAH! They were tasty. Through all these beers we learned that my dad loves sweeter beers, hates IPAs but LOVES Black IPAs haha go figure.

Back to brewing. There were about 12 people in the class and 2 people per beer so 6 beers were being brewed today. All different because when you sign up, they give you a list to choose from in the price range of the class. They also offer Imperial versions (stronger alcohol and flavors) and some specialty styles (Belgian Tripel). The Burnsides choose to brew a brown, but others that were being brewed was a Belgian Wit, a Pale, Irish Stout, and a Red ale. So each group came up to the boiling fryers one at a time to get their "starter wort" and threw in their grain tea bags to sterilize them. The room quickly filled with that sweet bready smells that I love and I was again in Heaven. Then, once you got your "starter wort" you brought your 5 gal. bucket back to your table and put your tea bag back in the bucket and stirred it for a long time to get all the goodness from the grains that you could. My dad took turns and made our brown look like chocolate sauce it was so dark. I mean, we wanted to get our money's worth haha. Then we added one container of hopped malt extract and one of non-hopped extract which saved us a step of adding real hops and probably making it too strong for most people (dad). At that point we added cold water to chill our wort and bring it up to 5 gal. Then we got a test tube of yeast from White Labs (which is a very reputable maker of brewers yeast) and added it to our bucket all while stirring. Our yeast was for an amber but it was the closest they had for brown ales. We stirred that in and hammered on our lids and put on the air lock to let the gas out and the alcohol in MMMMM.

The last order of business was to watch a scene from The Three Stooges about brewing beer. During the clip our teacher poured us all a sample of his chili mead that he had brewed. It was really good, sweet, dry, and SPICY!! Very good. Now dad and I will wait two or three weeks when we will make another appointment to rack our beer (basically siphon it into a glass container to help get rid of sediment and maker the beer "cleaner"). and a week after that, we go back again and bottle our beer. When we took the original gravity of our beer (basically what the original alcohol would be in our beer, we will take another reading when we are about to bottle to see what the actual alcohol reading will be) it came out to be that our beer will probably be about 7% ABV which is in the "Imperial" range, so for the regular price my dad and I were able to make it as strong as someone who paid more money BOOM! So in about 4 weeks, we may have a tasting of Burnsy's Brown for people to try. If you have any questions about beer or the class we took, ask away and I will try to answer as best I can.

I feel your pain germaphobes, then wash my hands

I was working out at the Wellness Center today and I finally get what germaphobes are yelling about. There are so many people this time of year at most workout facilities. This will most likely change in about a month as people have done their obligatory "try to keep a resolution". This influx of people, most of whom have no idea how to act in the gym, creates a germtastic situation. I saw things today I wish never to see again...EVER!! Let's start at the beginning, a very good place to start, Machine etiquette. I don't know how why people think that after they are done, they can just up and leave and not wipe down machines. I mean I went to a machine and it was wet. WET! Like someone just came out of a Russian sweat lodge and decided the best way to dry off was to do Lat Pulls. Needless to say, I was dry heaving while running to the anti-bacterial soap. Secondly, Showers. I understand people need to take their clothes off to take a shower, but that does not mean you can't close the curtains to your shower stall. When I'm trying to find an open stall to take my shower, I don't need to see hands all over your hairy Sasquatch body. Another thing, why don't they have doors on shower stalls? Why do those in charge think that a piece of water resistant cloth that is not big enough to cover the entire opening is more than sufficient? Lastly, and I know many people have this complaint is people gallivanting about in the buff like they are home alone. After walking by all these men doing their Heisman poses and sitting bare-butt on the seat, all I want to do is throw up. Instead I'm trying to dry off and put my clothes on and get ready to leave without touching anything. I won't sit on the benches, lean against the lockers. I will say one thing, it does help ones sense of balance when you won't touch anything because you saw old bean's beans all over the place. Sorry for those who are reading this and are feeling queasy. I know this is not what you might have expected but I need to get it off my chest. So to all two of you who read this and got this far, Thanks!